Lying to someone about what’s really happening is hurtful in the short-term. “Wondering why someone you love is trying to deceive you can make you question the relationship and yourself,” Stern says.
But gaslighting can have terrible consequences in the long-term, destroying the victim’s self-esteem and confidence and either trapping them in a dysfunctional relationship or blowing up the relationship.
It can have broader implications, as well. Over time, the person being gaslighted becomes conditioned to trust others’ perceptions more than their own, leading to a feeling of helplessness, brain fog, an inability to make decisions, memory problems, PTSD, depression, and anxiety – and these may not end even if the person leaves the relationship, Stern says.