
Social competence is such a broad concept that the nuances are often lost. To understand it, you have to have a level of social competence yourself and know what to look for as children develop it. The concept looks at the behavioural, emotional, and cognitive skills a child needs to develop adequate social skills to interact well with the people around them. As anyone with a child well knows, social skills are not made overnight; there is a (often painful) growing period where kids learn from their own mistakes, the adults around them and other children.
What Social and Emotional Competence Means for Kids
The social and emotional aspects of development are best discussed together because they go hand in hand. As children improve their emotional regulation, they are better able to interact with others.
Lev Vygotsky
A prominent Russian psychologist called Lev Vygotsky developed theories of social development that relied heavily on social interaction. He observed that students would very often develop higher-level thinking skills through interactions with others–not independently. At earlier fundamental stages of development, he proposed that someone known as the More Knowledgable Other (MKO), like a parent or teacher, would usually play a crucial role in nurturing children’s cognitive development by involving them in stimulating and meaningful activities. Through these interactions, adults help children understand and navigate their cultural perspectives and responses to the world.
The Modern View
In today’s world, social competence is seen as a complex skill that includes effective communication, emotional control, and the ability to build and maintain positive relationships. It is understood to be context-specific, changing across different social situations and cultural settings. The modern view looks at how we develop social skills at an early age and how that later affects personal and professional success, emphasising both individual traits and environmental factors.
On the other hand, Vygotsky’s theory centres on the sociocultural context of cognitive development. He believed that children learn social and cognitive skills through interactions with more knowledgeable individuals, such as parents and teachers. Vygotsky emphasised the role of social interaction and cultural tools in shaping a child’s development, suggesting that cognitive growth is a socially mediated process.
Social Competence for All
Unfortunately, for some, developing social competence is significantly more challenging. An increasing amount of kids live with conditions like Asperger’s Syndrome, which makes it far harder to develop social skills and often challenges teachers and parents alike. Fortunately, more resources are being made available, like student wellbeing courses for teachers, teacher aids for developmentally challenged kids, and specific streams for those who need more attention.
Supporting Social Competence
Parents play such a crucial role in developing their child’s social competence by actively teaching and modelling positive social behaviours. The research shows us that children are prone to over-imitating adult behaviour, so you can easily model positive social behaviour by showing empathy, effective communication, and conflict resolution in your daily interactions with others. This provides a clear example for the child to follow. Encouraging children to interact with peers as often as possible through playdates, group activities, and team sports helps them practice essential social skills like sharing, cooperation, and active listening. By creating these opportunities, parents can help their children learn how to navigate different social settings.
A large problem that children face is the lack of emotional education. Talking openly about emotions and teaching children how to manage and express their feelings in healthy ways can enhance their emotional regulation. Providing constructive feedback and praise when children demonstrate good social skills reinforces positive behaviour and builds their confidence. By maintaining a supportive and understanding environment, parents can help their children develop the skills needed to build and maintain positive relationships throughout their lives.
Challenges and Solutions
No two kids will learn to develop social competence at the same time or in the same way; it’s a process that takes time and energy, but the result is crucial for success in the adult world. If you have a child who is struggling to learn the nuances of social competence, do not fear; here in Aus, there are so many resources available. Schools and nurseries often provide social skills programs and counselling services where kids can learn through play or other less stressful methods. Community centres and local organisations often have workshops and activities designed to both equip adults with the skills to help and teach children how to build social skills themselves.
Child Psychology
If you feel overwhelmed or just feel like talking to a pro, child psychologists specialise in these exact situations. Because they understand at least some of the complex factors that drive childhood behaviour, child psychologists can often have valuable insights for parents, teachers, and caregivers that enable them to better support the child’s social and emotional growth.
Sessions do not need to be formally structured; activities like play therapy, role-playing, and guided interactions make learning social skills fun and engaging. Focusing on social development early on helps children build strong relationships and emotional well-being. It has been shown to set people up for success later on in their lives.
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