It is possible to find a wonderful partner at any age. Amanda and Rod share their inspirational love story here.
- Dating safely: “We went out as friends and we found love”
- “We now believe in love at first sight”
- This happy couple prove it's never too late to find love
Amanda and Rod from Victoria met online in early 2014 and married in July 2015. Amanda had been married for 34 years previously and has five children.
The couple had a beautiful wedding ceremony in July 2015
“We enjoy so many of the same things and are both caring people who look after each other.” – Amanda & Rod, happily married for one year
Amanda, 58 shares their love story here:
“I had been single for a while and joined the dating site eHarmony to meet a man whom I could love and enjoy life with. I have five children from a previous relationship and I was previously married for 34 years.”
“I knew there was something special about Rod the first time I met him”
After speaking for a few weeks on email and progressing to phone calls they met up and began what was to be the start of a beautiful relationship. “We started communicating in February 2014 and our first date was in March,” Amanda says.
“We met at Pelligrinis restaurant for dinner and then walked around the city. I knew there was something special about Rod the first time I met him and we married in July 2015.”
The happy couple love just spending time together and have happily created a new family dynamic. It is a new phase and a new start for both of them.
Amanda says, “My favourite thing about Rod is his kind, caring generous nature. Kindness … but throw in tall, good looking and great shoulders!”
“He is good company whether just sitting around, having a joke or a serious conversation”
They have loved creating a wonderful new chapter together and enjoy doing quiet things such as; “Going to our orchard in the country and spending time together. He is good company whether just sitting around, having a joke or a serious conversation – so (when he isn’t there) the thing I miss is just having him there.”
Rod and Amanda will be celebrating their one year wedding anniversary next month
How to date when you have kids
Dating can be more difficult when you have kids from a previous relationship but it is possible to find a wonderful partner. How can you juggle dating and caring for your kids?
Children are the most important part of a parent’s life. And because blending a new partner with your family can be stressful, it’s no surprise that dating often ends up taking a back seat.
Mary, a single mother of three children all aged under 15 years, says that she wants to start dating again, but is hesitant. “I worry about the impact it will have on the kids. They’ve already been through a lot,” she says.
Psychologist and dating coach Melanie Schilling can understand Mary’s feelings. “If your children have experienced a divorce or other stressful life stage, you may opt to protect them as they heal,” she says.
But your happiness does count and if you’re happy, experts believe you’ll be a better parent. “Once you believe your kids are in a more confident and stable place, jump back into the dating game – with caution,” says Melanie.
Once you have found a partner worthy of meeting your children, it’s all about setting up the situation so that your child feels as safe and secure as possible.
Amanda and Rod's relationship proves that age is no barrier to finding a life partner
The best time to introduce kids to a new partner is a very personal choice, however there are two questions you can ask yourself to help you decide when the time is right:
Question 1: On a scale of 1 – 10, how much do you trust your new partner? If it’s under seven, you may not be ready to introduce them to the children.
Question 2: If your partner went away forever after meeting your kids, what impact would it have on them?
The answers to these questions should give you some clarity, and if you do decide that you’re ready, the best place to introduce everyone is in an environment where your children feel comfortable and in control for the meeting.
“Keep it short and it’s a good idea to engage in some kind of activity together (like a game of cricket or a visit to the zoo) to dilute the impact of the meeting,” advises Melanie.
Of major concern for most parents is that their kids will not like their new partner. When Fiona, 52, first met her new partner, Tim, two years ago, she knew that if it was going to work, she would have to gradually introduce him into her kid’s life. “I didn’t try to force a relationship,” she explains.
“I just organised events where they could all get to know each other, but I tried to make sure they were more casual events like at the beach, rather than anything of too much importance, like my kid’s drama night,” says Mary. “That would have been too much pressure too quickly. We needed to build up to that.”
It’s true – relationships take time. “It’s a huge adjustment for your kids (and you!) so be patient, give your kids time and space and most important of all, listen to them,” says Melanie.
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